Who am I

Who am I? That is indeed the question. My name is Deb Stevenson and I am 56 years old. I was injured in a sawmill accident when I was 20 and spent many years in and out of hospitals learning important things like where they kept the warm blankets, and how to eat lying down. I read all sorts of books and spent many hours questioning the ceiling above me about the meaning of life. If they handed out frequent flyer hospital points, I would have had enough to travel around the world several times. But they don’t, so here I am.

In 2004 I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Here I was facing my own mortality and I wasn’t even sure what the purpose of my life was. It took me about three years to recover from the cancer treatments, and I was just starting to feel better when I was rear-ended and suffered a nasty whiplash injury. 

I believed that everything happened for a reason, but how did we discover exactly what the reason was?  

Why are we meant to suffer?  How much are we meant to suffer? Is there a reason for our suffering? 

Those are the questions I kept asking myself?  I just couldn’t get beyond the pain, I was totally stuck in it, and my world had shrunk to the size of my bedroom. Obviously talking to ceilings wasn’t getting me anywhere, and besides, now my neck was so sore I couldn’t even look up to see the ceiling.

I think it would be fair to say that I was pretty depressed at this point.

  Things began to shift for me when I started studying at the Chopra Center and became certified in primordial sound meditation. I started to see that working from the outside in hadn’t got me very far so perhaps it was time to begin working from the inside out. That was my ahah! moment. I had completely forgotten who I was, and had created a life story based on circumstances over which I had no control. I decided then and there to make a new life story for myself.

“We shall not cease from exploration, and at the end of all our exploring, will be to arrive where we started, and know the place for the first time.” T.S. Elliot

Along with the Chopra Center, I have also studied with the Proctor Gallagher Institute, done some work on sound healing with Jonathon Goldman and am presently working on getting my Bachelor of Arts in Metaphysical Science.

Up until a couple of years ago, I walked with a cane and quite a limp.

I was unable to move my neck from side to side or look up at the ceiling. Now, not only can I see the ceiling, but I can also see all the cobwebs up there as well.

Every moment we have a choice in what we think, say or do. We can react to situations with anxiety and fear, or respond consciously with love and an open heart. This is how I choose to live my life.

Does this answer the question of who I am?  I’ll let you decide.